Generational Faith - The Cornerstone is Relationship

It's easy to look at the anger, violence, and cultural disintegration of our nation and become fearful.  It seems rather hopeless.  It seems like lives are being wasted on the pursuit of the frivolous and that "claiming to be wise" we have become a nation of fools.

And that's partly true.  Selfies seem to matter more than selflessness these days.

But then you remember the power of GOD and how His love can transform a life in a MOMENT.

Children form their conception of WHO THEY ARE and WHO GOD IS from the adults and peers in their lives.  IDENTITY is typically realized in the context of community.  It isn't one person that defines who we are, it's a mosaic of the people in our lives.  The same is true of our view of God.  We typically don't form our opinion in a vacuum.  It is forged through the people in our lives, our experiences, and our own sense of identity.  So, when a kid's view of God and self is obstructed, it's devastating for their future.

As a high school English teacher, I once had a student who was a senior in high school and a pretty angry girl overall.  This was my first year of teaching and everything was new and confusing to me as I attempted to navigate old British literature with a room full of dynamic and sometimes explosive students.  This girl was often angry and combative, but she was usually fine for me.  Toward the end of her senior year, she asked me for a letter of recommendation.  She wasn't a stellar student, but she was on average a decent student for me, and I knew that my class was actually one of her better ones.

I agreed to write the letter, but I wasn't quite sure what I could say in it.  Before I had an opportunity to attempt a letter, she came in one day and lashed out in her anger at me.  She called me a curse word and made a scene.  I had no choice but to send her to the office and write her up. That afternoon, I called her home to share about the day's events and to tell her mom that I wouldn't be able to write a letter of recommendation at this time.  

I was not prepared for what came over the phone line.

Her mom assaulted me with a line of cursing directed not at me, but at her daughter.  She exclaimed, "I don't know why my daughter would want you to write a letter of recommendation because she is nothing but a B---- and a whore.  And if that whore thought that I was going to spend one penny on her to go to college to do nothing but sleep around, she's nuts.  That B----- is worthless.  I'm not surprised she acted like that.  She's trash."

I was stunned.  And in that moment, I realized how much power we have over the young people in our lives in defining who they are and what path they will take in life.

Suddenly, I saw this girl in an entirely new light.  If that level of anger and hatred was directed at her on a regular basis from her mother, no wonder she acted that way!  She defined herself in the confines of her mother's anger.  And that set her on the path leading to a lot of bad things.

Fourteen years later I still think about this girl.  I still pray for her on occasion, hoping that she somehow found a way to find peace in her life.  I hope that someone came into her life to speak words of hope and encouragement to her.  I hope that she had someone share with her that there was a future and hope planned for her before her birth and that she was loved beyond comprehension by her heavenly Father.

The sad reality for this girl and for many like her is that she's completely divorced from the idea of a loving parent.   Any concept of God that she might have had would spring out of that sea of anger and dysfunction.  God created her with a purpose and a plan.  Unfortunately, she might not see that because there are so many other voices shattering her self-image and obscuring her view of the path of life marked out for her by her Creator.

And here's the thing.  Maybe that started out small, but consider a ship at sea.  Personally, I get seasick on boats, so I don't like to think about them, but it's a good example, so stay with me.  If a ship is off course by just a small degree, it isn't noticeable at first.  But after a long time traveling on the wrong course, the ship gets farther and farther away from where it is meant to go.  The same is true of us.  When we start out life with a false understanding of who we are, who God is, and what it means to actively pursue and follow a relationship with Him, we end up off course.  It isn't noticeable at first, but after years pass by, we find ourselves nowhere near where God wants us to be and like nothing He designed us to be.  And that brings hurt, disappointment, and brokenness.  

The truth is that we all need someone speaking life into us, not just kids.  Parents are supposed to do that.  The church can help parents find a way to do that by partnering with them.  When you look at Deuteronomy 6:4-9, you will see that Moses spoke about the importance of the leaders in the community partnering with parents to ensure that the next generation of faith understood God in a personal way:

"Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one! You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.
And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates."

The transferring of faith from one generation to the next was about community and relationship and the cornerstone of this generational continuance of faith was to be the family.  Why?  Because following Jesus is not about an institution or a set of rules.  Following Jesus is about relationship and the best way to model and convey that to the next generation is through relationships.  That's why families and churches need to be intentional about how we convey a relationship with Jesus. 

It is for that reason that generational faith matters.  In his children's ministry book, Orange Essentials, Reggie Joiner said of children's ministry workers:

"You are the CHAMPIONS of family.  You are the ADVOCATES for the church.  But most
importantly...you are the MESSENGERS of of God ILLUMINATING, LOVING, and DEMONSTRATING His story of redemption to SONS and DAUGHTERS."

Imagine how different our culture would look if we just embraced this fully.  What if instead of focusing on PROGRAMMING in our churches, we focused on COMMUNITY? What if instead of focusing on filling the family calendar with ACTIVITIES, we focused it around being intentional and using every second to build relationships and impart GOD's INDENTITY for our children?  What if instead of seeing church as a place to SIT, we saw it as a place to SERVE and intentionally created opportunities for our kids to serve alongside of us?

There are so many angry and evil voices competing for your child's attention.  Don't let yours be one of them.  Don't passively accept that this is just the way things are.  Be intentional about finding people who will share your love for your child and impart the wisdom and hope that you do for them. And if you never had that yourself, there is good news--Jesus is all about restoring broken people.  There is a hope and future for you beyond your comprehension if you will just lean into Him.

Be A Gandalf: YOU SHALL NOT PASS

Gandalfs be like "YOU SHALL NO PASS"

If you've seen the first Lord of the Rings film or read the book, you know that Gandalf takes one for the team in the mines of Moria.

The evil Balrog flame creature thing is emerging from the shadows and threatens to engulf the entire fellowship of the ring in a terrifying fire akin to a tanning booth.

An expert on tanning, Gandalf knows that he can't let his team turn orange and embarrass themselves.

Tolkien's tale of the fellowship is quite interesting.  Frodo is the simple hobbit who bears the One Ring that has the potential to rule all of Middle Earth through the evil power of Sauron.  Sauron is an evil all-powerful being, although for most of the movie trilogy he is just an eye made of flames that sits atop a tower and looks around like a spotlight.

Frodo needs protection.  Hobbits are cool, but kinda useless.  Enter Aragorn, Gimli, Legolas and Boromir.  He also needs a true friend, enter Sam.  And also comic relief.  Enter Merry and Pippin.

Gandalf is similar to my previous blog topic, Yoda, in that he represents the sage archetype in literature.  Sages often initiate the selection of the hero and the beginning of the quest.  They call the hero to adventure, they nurture them, train them, protect them, and die.

Wait, what?

Well from a storytelling perspective, it makes sense for most sages to die.  And if you think about sages in popular culture, you will realize that most of them do.

Yoda.

Obi-Wan.

Micky from Rocky.

Gandalf (sorta).

Dumbledore (I think, but I've never actually read it.)

Doc (from Cars.)

Uncle Ben (from Spider-Man not the rice guy.)

Clark Kent's real dad and adoptive dad.

Bruce Wayne's parents (although Alfred replaces them.)

You get the idea.  At some point the sage steps off the stage to let the hero move forward.  In fact, his still being there means that the hero doesn't really have the incentive to step up to the plate and save the day because the older wiser mentor is there to handle it.

It's kind of like how I viewed my handy-man dad growing up.  He knew how to fix anything, so I never bothered to learn.  Why did I need to know how to fix stuff?  Dad can do that.  I'd rather watch television.

Of course, now I no longer live with my dad and I can't fix a thing.  When Luke refused to listen to Yoda he lost a hand.  When Spider-Man forgot that his uncle told him that "with great power comes great responsibility" he ended up enabling the dude who killed his uncle.

Bilbo and Frodo both benefit from the mentoring of Gandalf.  He alone sees of the elder Baggins in The Hobbit, that there is a "great deal more in him than you know and a deal more than he has any idea of himself," as he pitches the incompetent homebody Bilbo Baggins to be a burglar for a group of adventure-seeking dwarves.  Sages see our inner potential and they help us realize it.

In the Christian sense, sages understand that every child has been created in the image of God and EVERY KID has the potential to lead, to love, to inspire, to create, and to change the world.  And that's something worth cultivating and even dying for.

Gandalf as a sage doesn't technically die, but he disappears frequently in The Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings series in order to allow for his heroes-in-training to step up and do their job.

In the case of the above mentioned action, Gandalf makes a final stand in the mines of Moria.  He knows that he's likely not going to make it out of this alive, but he knows that the real mission is keeping Frodo alive so that he can get that ring to Mt. Doom to save Middle Earth.  He dramatically thrusts his staff into the ground and emphatically declares to the Balrog that "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"

The others end up running out of the mines.  Gandalf gets pulled down into the abyss with the super huge fire monster.

Frodo and the gang think that this is the end of Gandalf.  It is not.  He later returns as Gandalf the White, having succeeded in taking down the Balrog and emerging with new power just to finish the job.

In the meantime, however, Frodo grows into his role as a leader because Gandalf the Crutch is no longer there.  The same was true of the disciples.  Somewhat hapless ne'er-do-wells while Jesus was on earth, after His death, they finally step into the role that Jesus was preparing them for all along.  They finally connect the dots. They finally embrace the adventure that Jesus initiated for them.

All of our kids need Gandalfs in their lives.  And we need to never put our own adult egos ahead of the heart of a child.  Our job as parents and leaders is to lay down our lives to ensure that our children embrace the adventure that God has marked out for them.  Kids have this superhero power of a kid-sized faith passion that adults seem uneasy with.  The boundless energy and passion of a child is something that us geezers wish we could bottle.

What we lack in passion, however, we can make up for with wisdom and protection.

I love what Moses tells the Israelites in Exodus as the Egyptian army is advancing toward them.  He tells them to stand firm and they will see that the Lord will fight for them.  That this advancing menacing army that they see today, they will not see again.

Frodo never saw the Balrog again.  He stood there while Gandalf fought for him.

God will fight for our kids.  The needs will change over time, but our role will not.  It is up to us to show them true courage in standing firm in the Lord when scary life-altering things come their way.  (For me that is Mr. Peanut.) It's our job to stand in the gap for them like Gandalf and boldly declare to the enemy "YOU SHALL NOT PASS."  (Growing a beard and wearing wizard garb is optional.)

You never know what hangs in the balance if you fail to embrace your inner Gandalf.  If Gandalf didn't intercede on Frodo's behalf, Middle Earth would have been lost.  The kids that we are entrusted with are the Esthers, Moseses, Peters, Pauls, and Davids of their generation.  Every Esther needs her Mordecai, every Moses needs his Jethro, every David needs his Samuel or Nathan (depending on your mood.)

Future generations need this generation to rise to the occasion.  It is our job to ensure they get out of the mine to safely continue that journey.  And what a sacred task that is.

Calvary Chapel Gloucester County Kid Min Blog: The Determination of Moses!

This Sunday your child learned about the determination of Moses.  We looked at the adventures of Moses' life through the lens of needing to finish what you start and working with GOD to do that.  

Moses accomplished a  lot of great things during his life.  He led the Exodus of God's people from oppressive slavery in Egypt.  He parted called down the plagues on Egypt.  He parted the red sea.  He led the Israelites for 40 years in the wilderness and he met with God personally on top of the mountain and brought down the Ten Commandments (not the movie) to God's people.

He intervened time and time again for God's people when they lacked the determination to keep following God.

Through Moses, we saw that another aspect of developing a life-changing faith determination is to keep doing what is right because God is AWE-some.

To read the rest of the post, visit our church Kidmin blog by clicking below...

Calvary Chapel Gloucester County Kid Min Blog: The Determination of Moses!: 

My Boy Jackson: "I not broke down. God Made Me."

Jackson's famous pout...

Mad props to the Orange folks who are working on the First Look Curriculum!  It's making a difference in the lives of little ones like my son Jackson!

The First Look curriculum seeks to impart 3 basic truths to the wee tots entrusted to us:

God Made Me

God Loves Me

Jesus Wants To Be My Friend Forever

And my 4 year old son just demonstrated that it's catching on!

Jackson's sayings are famous around my house.  He has enthusiastically declared after watching a vintage Veggie Tales DVD that "God is bigger than the foogie man."  Multiple attempts to correct him were met with adamant denials of the existence of any such "boogie man."  The "foogie" man is his real name and slime comes out of his ears.  He was wearing his "fweatshirt" at the time of these denials.

He's also been known to ask if we are going to take a "hair cut" to get home sooner (presumably "short cut") and asked the nice lady waitress at Friendly's to put "hot vudge" on his ice cream.

This past weekend, he was playing with key chains and declared an all-consuming love of "cheese canes" which admittedly don't sound like such a bad idea to me.

And my personal favorite is his perennial answer to the question "What do you think Jackson?" which is, of course, "Yes, I do think!"   Except on bad days, when it is a sullen "No, I don't think!"

His latest addition to the Jackson Lexicon was actually a God moment from the lips of a four year old poet.  This past week, I was being my usual silly self and mangling a show-stopping song from his older sister Reagan's kindergarten "train play" in which she plays a haughty purple tiger who rebuffed cries of "please stop and help us" with a curt, "help you, I should say not!"

The song I was mangling actually goes as follows:

Please stop and help us

Please stop and help us

Please stop and help us

Our engine's broken down

My version, of course, replaced "Our engine's broken down" with "Our Jackson's broken down."

Admittedly not the most ego-boosting statement to make to your son, but a fanciful line of whimsy nonetheless.  Jackson, however, was not amused.

His angry face and pouty lips took shape as he declared, "I not broke down!  God made me!"

Now grammatical errors aside, it was a statement that made me smile.

My 4 year old knows that God made him, and as a result, that he's not a mistake, broken down, or worthless.   At his incredibly young age, thanks to the Deuteronomy 6 partnership between his parents and his church leaders, young Jackson has embraced a teaching that is so absolutely life-altering that many folks wrestle all of their lives to fathom it, much less live it.  Jackson the theologian was applying the key biblical truth from Psalm 139 to himself and  declaring (in typical Jackson-ese):

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."   Psalm 139:13-14 

That is the kind of true life change that folks working with the Orange curriculum can expect.

Teaching with an end in mind works.  Working with parents to reach this next generation to plug them into the purposes of God is an amazing blessing and privilege.  When kids like Jackson can take hold of the big boulders of faith, it's much easier for him to build his household of faith on the solid foundation of Jesus Christ.

And it's certainly more than enough to fight off the evils of the foogie man!

Learning From The Maniacal Plankton

Plankton planning world domination...

"See how good your life can be when you're maniacal?!?!"

This wonderful quote was spoken screamed to Sponge Bob by the ever-scheming Plankton as he was trying to teach him to assert himself in the most villainous way.

Plankton is like a lot of us.  He just wants to take over the world via the Krabby Patty secret formula and yet most of the sea-dwelling citizens of Bikini Bottom don't even notice him.  Most people just step on him or walk right by completely unaware that Plankton is shouting maniacal threats of world domination to them from an altitude equivalent to their ankle height.

When one actually does hear his maniacal villainous rants, they just nonchalantly say "good luck with that" and go about their day.

I know what you're thinking.  "You are such a bad parent that you let your kids watch Sponge Bob!"

And maybe "What the heck does Plankton have to do with me?  I don't plan world domination or own a fast food joint called the Chum Bucket!"

And even a little of "How did he know that I secretly plot world domination?!"

Personally, I don't plan world domination.  I wouldn't mind being selected for Survivor at some point in the near future, but that's about as exciting as my plans for world domination get.

I also can't really relate to Plankton's miniscule size.  There's always been more of me to love.

His obsession with food?  That I do understand!

So where am I going with this?

First of all are you really sure you don't try to rule the world?

Really?  That's interesting because I could have sworn that most people spent their lives plotting and scheming about ruling the world.

Well, maybe you can relate to that whole part about Plankton not being taken seriously, being stepped on or being ignored and largely unseen by the world around him.

Why is that?

Why in the world do we live life being unseen, unheard, or feeling unappreciated and unaccomplished?  Why do we spend our time plotting and scheming for the Krabby Patty secret formula to no avail?

The Bible tells of the authority Jesus gave his followers in Luke Chapter 10 where Jesus sent out 72 of his closest followers to heal and restore folks, cast out demons, and share the Gospel of Christ in full power and authority to a world in need.  In Luke 10:17-20 we read:

17 The seventy-two returned with joy and said, "Lord, even the demons submit to us in your name." 18 He replied, "I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven. 19 I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you. 20 However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven." 

So Jesus gives us "authority" and the "power" to overcome the enemy.  He even proclaims that nothing will harm us.

And yet we either refuse to believe and walk in that power or rejoice in the position and prestige without regard to the responsibility (hence his warning not to rejoice in the power, but that our names are written in heaven!)

Plankton's foolishness doesn't have to be ours.  We have authority and power but it's not for ourselves.  It's time we started living, walking, and talking like it!

In Compass Kids, our children's church program at True North, we began to talk about the virtue of initiative--seeing what needs to be done and doing it.  We looked at the life of Nehemiah and that crumbling wall and gate situation facing Jerusalem.

Nehemiah was not living in Jerusalem at the time.  And yet, he wept and prayed to the Lord about what to do.  He saw something that needed to be done and he did it.

In church, Pastor Jesse encouraged us to shatter the 80/20 rule of church.  Statistically 20% of the people in the church do 80% of the work.  God didn't call some of us, He called all of us.  You aren't given gifts and abilities to entertain yourself.  You have a purpose, and unlike Plankton it isn't world domination, but rather world deliverance.

Get in the game people!

There is so much to do.  Or as the Bible says "the harvest is plenty but the workers are few."  Open your eyes and look around!

Don't hide your light under a bowl.  Shine.  Serve.  Love.  Witness.

Don't rule the world.  Change it and let Him rule.