Activate A Child's Faith: Every Kid Needs a Champion

Every kid needs a champion.

In nearly fifteen years of teaching in a public high school, and ten years of leading children’s ministry at church, I’ve had a wide range of experience.  From pre-school to graduating seniors, I’ve been involved in every phase through either my church life or my work life.  Being the father of three kids also helps.

And one truth that is undeniable throughout my years of experience is this--kids need a champion.

The children and teens that I’ve worked with who have been the most successful in achieving success have been those who had a champion rooting for them, encouraging them, and helping guide them through the minefield of life.

While this concept of a champion is not necessarily a shocking revelation, it is unfortunately far less common than it should be.

And in the age of social media, true authentic relationships are often drying up and replaced by the fake, surface level digital facades.  

Psychologists will tell you that human beings have a deep need of community and a sense of belonging.  And studies are showing that social media is having the opposite effect.  While we might know more about our friends and acquaintances (like what they ate for dinner!) we KNOW them less.  We know more about the life events big and small, but less of their heart.  And the inevitable comparisons contained in the filters, platforms, and messaging of the various social media platforms can have a tremendous hindering impact on our self-esteem creating depression and isolation.

Today’s generation is the first to be truly immersed in digital citizenship from birth on.  Toddlers are playing games on tablets and young kids are making duckfaces for selfies.  

By contrast, I had a pager during college so that I could call you from a pay phone if you really needed to get ahold of me and my computer made weird squawking bird sounds when it took about 20 minutes to connect to the internet.  

Children today are growing up in a world where learning how to develop an authentic relationship is a skill that they have very limited practice with.  And with the central role that relationship plays in activating an authentic faith, that’s dangerous ground.

That’s why kids need a CHAMPION.

GENERATIONAL FAITH: PAUL & TIMOTHY

The book of 2 Timothy is a great picture of a godly mentorship.  The older Paul is writing to his younger colleague in the ministry to encourage him.  And everything about the passage speaks to relationship.  In chapter 1, Paul reminds Timothy that it was because of his grandmother and mother than he came to faith and that Timothy is but the latest generation in a link of faith.  He encourages Timothy to continue in the faith and activate the faith of the next generation by investing in them as his mom and grandmother did for him.  

Then Paul CHAMPIONS Timothy to stay in the faith and contend for the faith.  He also reminds him of the example of his own life:

“You, however, know all about my teaching, my way of life, my purpose, faith, patience, love, endurance, 11persecutions, sufferings—what kinds of things happened to me in Antioch, Iconium and Lystra, the persecutions I endured. Yet the Lord rescued me from all of them.” 2 Timothy 3:10-11

Paul didn’t just teach Timothy theology.  He showed up.  Big time.  He modeled an authentic faith.  He walked through the doubts and persecution with him.  He was a CHAMPION for Timothy.

WHAT ABOUT PARENTS?

Parents are the biggest influence (present or absent) in their child’s life.  Period.  

They are uniquely positioned to influence their child in positive or negative ways through their relationship, their habits, their personality, their words, and their example.  They have the greatest capacity for being a CHAMPION of their own children.

Parents can’t always be that champion for every stage, however.  For example, during the teenage phase, kids are much more willing to share things with other leaders, mentors, teachers, and coaches rather than their own parents.  It’s just reality.  And it’s a reality that my wife and I are learning now that our oldest is in high school.  Parents need to be intentional about establishing those kinds of relationships with adults who will reinforce what they would say to their child if they could.  Churches need to be intentional about providing them with “Pauls” for this very purpose.

WARMTH & CONSISTENCY

Being a champion doesn’t necessarily mean being the coolest and most trendy old person on the scene.  It just means showing up with a willingness to engage.

That’s why most children’s ministries are now embracing a small group-based model with a consistent leader who will show up every week in the life of their few.  When you “lead small” you are actually making a big impact.  Churches have for many years just tossed whatever unwitting fool was standing in the doorway into their children’s and student’s ministry environments.  They’ve been willing to schedule folks around their convenience and only ask for a limited commitment or sporadic scheduling for fear of not having enough volunteers.

Our kids deserve better.  As Reggie Joiner says, “never put the needs of an adult above the heart of a child.”

Having a consistent adult in their lives will provide them with the safe place to share their doubts and questions about their faith, and allow them to have someone other than their parents that knows them.  This is tremendously important to developing a vibrant faith that they can own and activate in their daily life.

I would guess that most of my former students would probably not remember a great deal of the specific lessons that I taught.  (Although our games of Survivor were pretty epic during the Lord of the Flies unit, and I’m not sure they will ever discard the importance of color symbolism after our enthralling chats on The Great Gatsby.)  I do think that I’m a good communicator and teacher. But if I’m honest, the most meaningful impact that I’ve made in the lives of the kids entrusted to me has not been academic.  It’s been relational.  What does last, hopefully, is how I made them feel and how I helped spark their belief in themselves or their curiosity in their purpose.  Hopefully during our time together, they knew that I was there to cheer them on to success.

Each person is unique and uniquely gifted.  Each person has a temperament and learning style that differs from their peers.  The “one size fits all” approach to education or developing an authentic faith in Jesus never works, but the one consistent factor is RELATIONSHIP.   

Here’s what I know:

1. CHILDREN ARE NOT ALL THE SAME--even within families--so no approach or model can be applied exactly the same to every child in exactly the same way.  What works with one child, doesn’t work with another.  It takes RELATIONSHIP to understand that and employ the right approach.
2. CIRCUMSTANCES DEMAND FLEXIBILITY--there will be times in that child’s life where the circumstances of life (family dysfunction, dealing with the death of a loved one, personal relationships, substance abuse, depression, bullying, etc.) overshadow what the lesson plan for the day is.  A champion will recognize this and use the circumstances to help grow the child in some way.   That doesn’t always mean teaching.  Sometimes it means just showing up and being present.  During a particularly challenging day in my teaching career, we had a student killed in a car accident which several other students were involved in (as drivers and passengers.)  Most of the school day was spent standing in the hallway with students collapsing into uncontrolled sobbing masses.  We didn’t teach academics that day.  We didn’t try to talk them through it.  We did the only thing we could--grabbed a box of tissues, hugged desperately hurting students, modeled love and support during a time of intense tragedy.  The same is true in growing faith.  God often uses circumstances in our lives to grow our faith.  A consistent leader will be able to pour into our kids during those times when they really need it--and be fully aware of the backstory and bigger picture in that child’s life to help them gain perspective later on.
3. GENERATIONS ARE NOT ALL THE SAME--growing up today are not the same as kids growing up in the 1990s, or the 1980s, or the 1970s, or any decade prior to that.  If we want to influence them and their faith, we need to get to KNOW THEM.  Consistency is key in that.  As Reggie Joiner says, “you can’t influence someone you don’t know.”

It’s the job of the church to partner with families to ensure that every child has a CHAMPION.  

And how can you be a champion?  It doesn’t require training, or academic finesse.  It doesn’t hinge on your communication skills.  It’s as simple as this:

1. Show up.
2. Care deeply.
3. Listen intently.
4. Pray fervently.
5. Know them genuinely.
6. Impart truth regularly.
7. Model faith authentically.
8. Encourage liberally.

When you show up to be a CHAMPION in the life of a child, you are changing the course of a life, the destiny of a family, and the reality of future generations.  It’s worth it.  Show up.

Involved in student ministry?  Children’s ministry?  Teaching?  What are some of the ways that you’ve SHOWN UP to be a CHAMPION for your entrusted few?  How have you LED SMALL?